How To Write A Wedding Speech: The Ultimate Guide For Do’s, Don’ts, and Delivery PART 2/3: Don’ts

If you didn’t catch Part One in our ultimate guide for how to write a wedding speech and deliver it like a pro, go read it on our blog! And then continue here for Part Two, where we highlight some common pitfalls and wedding speech mistakes some people make that you need to avoid for yours. 

If you’re wondering how to write a wedding speech, here are a few “Don’ts” to keep in mind and things you should avoid.

1. Copying from the internet
2. Politics
3. Inside jokes
4. Crudeness
5. Trouble with the law
6. Making fun of the newlyweds or guests
7. Embarrassing the couple
8. Exes and past relationships
9. Relationship troubles
10. Wedding planning low points

1. Copying from the internet

If you’re struggling with how to write a wedding speech, do NOT just copy something from the internet. Whether it’s jokes, overly-used concepts, or fully recycled speeches, you can bet most people have heard it all before. It will bore your audience and make you seem unoriginal. 

This is not to say you can’t go to the internet for inspiration! Be encouraged to seek inspiration for ideas, templates to help with structure, famous quotes, and suggestions for do’s and don’ts. Just make sure you turn those suggestions and inspirations into something original and special to honor the newlyweds and their guests. 

2. Politics

This should go without saying, but don’t bring up politics in your wedding speech. 

It doesn’t matter how good the joke might be; bringing up politics just rubs people the wrong way, especially when the general mood is supposed to be positive and celebratory. 

While one-half of the people there might be amused, the other half will be annoyed. It’s just not worth it. 

3. Inside jokes

Another thing to keep in mind for how to write a wedding speech is that inside jokes are only fun for the people in them and don’t really have a place where the audience is a large gathering (for instance – a wedding). 

Unless the joke can be easily explained as part of the speech before the punchline is made, there will be many confused and alienated people. Save the inside jokes for the more intimate gatherings where those in attendance are already aware of it. 

4. Crudeness

Keep in mind when learning how to write a wedding speech that grandmothers, mothers, and children are present. 

If you regularly curse like a sailor amongst your friends, more power to you. But a wedding speech is not a proper place for crude and offensive language or more explicit tales about the newlyweds and their wild partying exploits. Someone is sure to get unnecessarily offended and made very uncomfortable. 

Keep the content clean and something the whole room can enjoy.

5. Trouble with the law

Maybe you and the groom like to reminisce about that wild night you spent sobering up in jail together as an ice breaker at parties, but a wedding reception is not the time for this one. 

There are likely coworkers, bosses, and grandmothers present who would be shocked by such revelations and could potentially even get the groom in trouble. This is not the crowd you want to “out” your friend to. Save that for the bachelor party.

6. Making fun of the newlyweds or guests

While a little light-hearted teasing is okay, another thing to keep in mind for how to write a wedding speech is that it’s never okay to flat-out make fun of the newlyweds or any of the guests present. Making jokes at the expense of others is just rude in general, but even more so when you bring people down in a large gathering intent on honoring and building up a couple of newlyweds. This is a wedding toast, not a roast! 

The same can be said of embarrassing the couple. You might have a really juicy story to tell that you know would get a big reaction, but if it embarrasses the newlyweds don’t do it. You’re not there to upset them on their wedding day or make people feel awkward at their expense. 

You want your speech to leave the couple and their guests feeling uplifted and optimistic, not uncomfortable.

7. Exes and past relationships

Mentioning exes or past relationships the newlyweds may have had is a BIG wedding speech no-no when you go to write a wedding speech. 

Whatever the reason is that makes you consider bringing up a previous relationship, just don’t do it. It is awkward and makes the guests and the newlyweds feel uncomfortable, which is not why you are up there. 

Keep the focus on the present and future happiness of the couple, not on the past. 

8. Relationship troubles

Wedding speeches should be celebratory, light-hearted, and warm. So the next tip for how to write a wedding speech is not to invite tension by mentioning any troubles the couple may have had or are having, or any disagreements with inlaws or relatives. Keep the outlook positive and optimistic by not even hinting at these issues.

9. Wedding planning low points

If your bestie has been a bit of a bridezilla and there have been struggles during the wedding planning process, this is not the time to get that out of your system. Not even in jest. 

You are there to make the bride and groom shine and have their moment. If there have been struggles, keep those to yourself; or share those anecdotes only within a close, trusted circle that includes the bride/groom.

Hopefully, you found these tips for how to write a wedding speech and avoid some common pitfalls helpful. And stay tuned to our blog for the next part in this ultimate guide for how to write a wedding speech where we highlight a few things you should keep in mind when it comes to delivering your killer wedding speech like a pro.

Love this content and want more? Read more about weddings on our blog! Involved in the wedding planning process and the bride is still looking for a venue? Give us a call today and we’ll help you find the perfect place!